Coping with Your Fertility Journey: Step-by-Step
Infertility is a common issue that many people face on their fertility journey. So, if you’ve recently been diagnosed with infertility, you’re not alone. According to the CDC, one in five women in the United States are not able to become pregnant after one year. Some of these women will experience infertility even after a prior birth (referred to as secondary infertility), although this is less common.
What is infertility?
Typically, infertility is diagnosed after 12 months of regular, unprotected sex does not result in pregnancy. For those over the age of 35, that window is shortened to just six months. The CDC says about 10-15% of couples worldwide are experiencing infertility right now, and this is caused by a combination of factors that can originate from one or both partners.
Typically, infertility in women is caused by a physical barrier in the body like a blocked fallopian tube, endometriosis, or pelvic inflammatory disease. Infertility in men, on the other hand, can be caused by low sperm count, morphology, or motility issues. If you know you may want to become pregnant, and you’re experiencing symptoms such as irregular periods or have undergone treatment for cancer, you should speak with a fertility specialist.
What are your options?
Understanding your infertility diagnosis is the first step toward overcoming it. Your fertility doctor will consider your situation to recommend a uniquely tailored approach to your fertility journey, but ultimately, how you approach your infertility is up to you. If you decide to pursue parenthood and want to preserve your genetic connection to your child, your options will be intrauterine insemination (IUI) or a form of assisted reproductive technology (ART) like in vitro fertilization. Otherwise, you might consider surrogacy with both egg and sperm donation, or adoption.
Assisted Reproductive Technology
Assisted reproductive technology is a category of reproductive medicine where either the egg or embryo are handled. The most common form of ART is in vitro fertilization (IVF).
During the IVF process, physicians use hormone medication to stimulate the ovaries to produce eggs, which they’ll retrieve and fertilize in a lab with sperm, forming one or more embryos. Once the embryos have had some time to mature in the lab, they are transferred back to the uterus for implantation. Less common forms of ART include Gamete intrafallopian transfer (GIFT) and Zygote intrafallopian transfer (ZIFT).
Intrauterine Insemination (IUI)
IUI is another common fertility treatment option. It involves washing sperm to remove the seminal fluid, and then inserting the sperm directly into the uterine cavity for fertilization. As this is a less invasive and costly treatment, it’s commonly recommended as a first step. Moreover, many insurance providers require undergoing IUI before they will cover infertility treatments like IVF.
Egg, Sperm, or Embryo Donations
Gamete donation is an option for same-sex couples, single moms, or couples with one partner who is experiencing infertility. You may choose to pursue gamete donation in conjunction with IVF or IUI. Gamete donation involves using a donor’s sperm, eggs, or embryos for conception. By using one partner’s egg or sperm, you can use gamete donation to preserve a genetic connection to your child. It’s also a way to avoid passing one’s genetic disorders to your child.
Surrogacy
If you or your partner cannot carry your child, your physician may recommend gestational surrogacy. In surrogacy, an embryo is fertilized using your sperm or eggs or a donor gamete, then transferred into the uterus of a surrogate.
Adoption
Adoption is an excellent option for parents when having a genetically-related child may not be a possibility. Many same-sex or single parents choose adoption. It’s also common among parents for whom pregnancy poses too much of a health risk, or when the possibility of passing on a genetic disease is too great. Whatever the reason may be, options for adoption include private domestic infant adoptions, foster care adoptions, and international adoptions.
What decision will you make?
Infertility is a challenge for any hopeful parent experiencing it. Choosing to face infertility by setting goals, connecting with a fertility specialist, and finding strategies to address the emotional and physical stress of possible treatment may help. You get to decide what your fertility journey looks like, and you don’t have to do it alone.
You may already be making decisions with a partner or other loved ones. Either way, you’ll want to seek out a fertility specialist to help. They will guide you through your options and help you make more informed decisions based on your personal situation. Being informed and prepared for what’s to come can help you feel empowered and avoid feeling like your fertility is out of your control.
It’s impossible to predict what your fertility journey will look like, but you can consider these questions to help you prepare:
- Who is on your support team?
- How will you support yourself mentally and emotionally when no one else is there?
- Can you avoid other major life transitions, such as a move or job change, during this time?
- How will you handle unexpected costs that may come with new procedures that could be needed?
- Do you know what decision to make if you encounter multiple births, premature birth, or other complications that may arise from fertility treatment?
Don’t be surprised if learning how to manage your infertility feels overwhelming at first. Your fertility specialist may ask you to assess your emotions before beginning treatments. They can also recommend a counselor or support group. Take time to focus on yourself and your relationships as you begin this process.
If you choose IVF, these are some resources that may help
In vitro fertilization is one of the most common options for fertility treatment, and making the decision to pursue IVF treatment comes with a unique set of challenges. In collaboration with a fertility specialist, you will want to pursue resources that can help you throughout the process.
Support groups
A support group is helpful, even if you have people in your life that you know will be there if things get tough. Your friends and family members may not be able to understand what you’re experiencing. Working with people who are going through similar experiences as you can be a lifeline while you learn to cope with infertility and your treatment. Try the resources below to find an in-person or virtual support group to work with:
Acupuncture
Acupuncture is a popular complementary therapy that can help with the physical impacts of stress on the body that come with IVF. It is known to improve blood flow and even improve your odds of having a successful pregnancy through IVF treatment. Ask your fertility specialist about acupuncture treatment options near you.
Podcasts
Podcasts are a great way to hear personal stories of people who’ve gone through their own fertility journey and pursued IVF. Educate yourself on all things related to IVF treatment – learn about the process, possible outcomes, and the risks associated with it. This will help you to develop realistic expectations as you begin your IVF journey. You might start with these podcasts:
You get to decide how to approach your fertility journey. No matter what direction you take, you’re not alone. You have resources to help you tackle this challenge. If you’re struggling with infertility, reach out to a fertility specialist today.
